The road to growth and success is normally filled with failures or struggles. Sometimes in life, it’s hard to break through the next steps as it feels like something is holding you back. This can be a trauma or bad event which for some reason unfolds in your mind again, and again. Theses associated feeling of fear, anger or pain may be-able to be dissolved using the power of forgiveness.
We have all had some terrible event in our lives or had the scar from a person who did not treat us in the best manner. These moments can be the bottle neck and stop positive emotions flowing.
Forgiveness has been used in the human belief systems for thousands of years and shows up in almost every religion. Although you don’t need to be religious to forgive or be forgiven, it has become an important process for use when healing.
Bottled Up Emotions and holding grudges
The build-up of extreme pressure of dark emotions is completely unhealthy and can create broken bridges in relationships. Holding grudges eats away at you and creates hostile environments.
For you to move out of this place, it is vital to learn the art of forgiveness. Some hold an eye for eye and a tit for a tat. The power comes from the better person/s who can let go of this.
The power of forgiveness can go both ways and benefits the forgiven as much as the forgiver.
Can’t forget, try to forgive
Some events are just too traumatising to forget or wounds too deep to not feel. If you cannot let go of the memory, you can still forgive and have different attachment to it.
It may be impossible to forget, but you can always forgive. The power is in your hands and it is extremely strong. Digging deep to forgive could be the night or day difference with improving other factors of life.
This process of forgiving is not to justify the opposite party’s wrong doing, but to find peace within yourself releasing all that negative energy. You could use all the new positive energy to send to love ones or do better in life.
Forgiveness for good health
Holding fear and anger inside you for a long time can have severe implications on your mental and physical health. Emotional health can cause physical ailments that cannot be explained by your doctor. A common one is ‘Emotional Back Pain’ which is suffered by many.
Using the power of forgiveness to unblock emotional energy that’s locked in your system can have a real healing effect on your physical body. The work of shamans, priests and gurus have known the power of breaking through emotions. This tool has been used for healing physical health for thousands years.
Forgiveness is one of the 8 positive emotions that ensure we stay connected with others and ourselves according to Harvard researcher George Valiant. The other 7 emotions which are the key to living a fulfilling life should include love, compassion, joy, faith, awe, hope and gratitude.
My journey with forgiveness
I had many difficult events in my life, that out of nowhere, come into my mind, create a fierce anger and rage that would be difficult to pass. Even though meditation helped me, they would still haunt me from time to time.
One of these events happen when I was about 14 years old. I started at a new school, and out of nowhere, a boy almost double my size punched me in the face twice without any warning. I remember falling on the floor, tasting of blood in my mouth and feeling helpless at the time.
I would replay this event in my mind over many years and then think of plans of vengeance against this individual.
I was amazed how long this event stayed with me. Well up into my 30’s, this trauma would still come up time to time, haunting my mind and bringing me to a helpless and angry place.
This event was absorbing energy in my mind, body and soul and likely stopping me from doing better for the world.
When I discovered the power of forgiveness, I used it to change my attachment to this event and it has never caused any pain or anger again.
How to resolve internal conflict
You must remember that it’s all going on internal and only you have the power to release this internal conflict.
A brilliant exercise I came across was Tony Robbins – Hands on Heart exercises and resolving internal conflict. Listen to this audio of Tony on the Tim Ferriss Show where he runs through the process of changing your state and feelings towards this horrible event.
-Just say it – Are you feeling the grief of wrong doing. Next time you see that person, pull them a side and just say sorry. You’ll be surprised how the other person will react and even if it’s minor. The weight will be lifted off your shoulders.
-Stop feeling like the victim in the situation and try to transcend to a higher importance. This will enable you to make your move to forgiveness.
-Think of how valuable it would feel after for the forgiver and the forgiven. This will give you more motivation to move forward with action.
-The key to forgive a person/s that you absolutely hate is to change your emotional state before you do so. Remember doing this will help with your happiness and health levels, so it worth enduring.
Have you had healing results with forgiveness. We’d love you to share your thoughts below.